There are many ways a person can be mistreated at work. Usually the mistreatment is said to stem from envy due to an individual's competency. The sad fact is research shows that legally, victims lack support and lose their jobs, while abusers retain their positions and continue abusing others. Lives are affected, and mental health and relationships suffer. Even sadder still, lives are lost through the pain and suffering caused by people who feel insecure and determined to ruin the lives of others, to make themselves feel better.

I feel, as many do, this problem cannot continue.

I sit here now having recently left my problematic position within the last two months. I realize that I need to stop being invisible and I need to stand with — and up for — the many who share my experiences of abuse in the workplace. I would like to share my experiences with you, and we can share small smiles of comfort and validation. Then we can roar and fight to be heard and...

You struggle to get out of bed in the morning. You go through the motions just to make it through the day. 

You wonder, “Does it get better?”

You used to have hope for work and life in general, but you now wonder how you’ll get back to the old you who used to laugh and feel excited. Now you feel stuck in bitterness, anger, numbness, or depression — losing faith in employers and the system that protects them.

I’ve been there. We’ve all been there.

I see so many targets in the same place. I festered in a state of bitterness wondering when I’d stop ruminating. It would begin as soon as I woke up. Day after day.

That is, until I learned the 3 mistakes I was making that kept me stuck.

1. Believing I was the problem

When we want the organization we work for to do well — and we’re taught to self-reflect and respect authority — internalizing blame and shame becomes too easy to do. But bullies push their own insecurities and...