Why you're a target of workplace abuse

Uncategorized Sep 15, 2020

Don't worry - I'm not about to blame you for being a target of workplace abuse. Just the opposite. It's narcissism that's the root of why abusers abuse. And when those in power operate on jealousy and insecurity, their biggest threats are the ones with targets on their backs.

Here are a few reasons why you're a target:

  • Strengths (think ethics and competence, technical or people skills, for example) threaten abusers.
  • It's all about the abuser's personality, mob mentality the abuser created, and organizational incentives to keep the abuse going.
  • Abusers might perceive a vulnerability in you. Maybe you're not political. But vulnerability is a strength, not weakness. Narcissists are terrified of vulnerability. And while a certain level of political game-playing may be necessary at work, focusing entirely on politics detracts from your greater purpose at work: to work together toward a common vision as a team.

The bottom line

Narcissists view work differently than you do because they're insecure. That's it. There is NOTHING you can do to change them. While I may post articles about how you can react to an abuser, I simply suggest coping strategies to address the problem: the abuser. Whether or not our suggested tactics work have nothing to do with any flaws in you and everything to do with getting you to a healthier place when dealing with these abusive bosses.

You are not the problem.

Their insecurities are not your flaws.

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